Man breaks into adult toy shop for sex with dolls

In a report from Australia, a man smashed into an adult toy shop and had sex with the blow-up dolls before abandoning them in an alley.

Business owners in Cairns believe the same culprit is responsible for the break-ins and cash register thefts at the Sapphire Bar as well as three break-ins at the Laneway Adult Shop in recent days.  He reportedly would smash through walls and squeeze through tight areas (the original report said “tight holes” but I wasn’t going there).

The owner of the adult shop, who wished to be named only as Vogue, said that in a first unreported break-in, the man had stolen five dolls and had sex with one of them.

“He has been taking the dolls out the back and blowing them up and using the dolls and leaving them in the alley,” he said.  “It is totally bizarre.  It is a real concern that someone like that is out on the street.”

Vogue said a sex toy also went missing in the second break-in and that the offender had a liking for the doll model named “Jungle Jane,” which had been taken on both occasions.  He said he was dumbfounded that the burglar also had the “weird” habit of cleaning up the mess he had made after entering the building.  The burglar again smashed through a wall in the roof area of the shop earlier this week but was scared off by a newly installed alarm system.

Vogue and David Sharman, the owner of the Sapphire Bar that has an entry (original report stated it’s a “rear entry” but, once again, I try to remain tasteful) in the same alley as the adult shop, both believe they have been targeted by the same thief.  Both men said fleeting video images showed the burglar as being a tall, skinny Caucasian.  He has left DNA evidence at the crime scene.  No kidding….

Mr Sharman said in regards to one break-in at his business:  “The burglar smashed a hole near the top of the roof line. He then clambered 15m down a sheer wall.  He (only) took the surveillance recorders – we found them in the bin.”

Pennsylvania family has unwelcome Christmas guest

Talk about a creepy visitor on Christmas — and I’m not referring to Santa Claus….

A Plains Township, Penn., family didn’t know they had a squatter in their attic until local police and their K-9 officer located a man in their home.  Stanley Carter, 21, was charged with criminal trespass, several counts of burglary, theft, and receiving stolen property.

Carter had reportedly been staying with friends in the shared duplex when they asked him to leave.  The friends then filed a missing persons report a few days before Christmas after he went missing December 19th.  He accessed the shared attic space through a trap door.

Stacy Ferrance, owner of the home, said that Carter came out of his hiding space wearing her daughter’s pants and her sweatshirt and shoes.  Ferrance notified the police when a laptop, iPod, and cash were found missing on Christmas Day.  She called again the next day after finding footprints in her closet — the location of the other trap door leading to the attic.

Carter kept a list of everything he had pilfered from Ferrance’s home and even labeled it “Stanley’s Christmas List” in order to log all the items he “donated” to himself.  Police found the list as they were going through the inventory of what he took.

Ferrance said she had heard noises but thought they were caused by her children.  “From what I gather, he was helping himself to my home, eating my food, and stealing my clothes,” she said.

Port St. Lucie makes crime news again with flushed gun

What is up with Port St. Lucie, Florida??  I’ve already blogged on two sandwich assaults from there.  Now, a criminal has been arrested after the detective interviewing him wasn’t able to get a toilet to flush.

No….it wasn’t the detective’s fault that the commode wasn’t operating properly.  He was investigating the theft of a handgun, cash and jewelry from a Jensen Beach, Fla., home.  The 21-year-old suspect was staying in a Port St. Lucie hotel where the detective met with him.

Obviously forgetting where he hid some of his stash, the suspect allowed the detective to use the restroom.  When the toilet wouldn’t flush, he removed the cover from the tank and found the stolen handgun and three loaded magazines.   The suspect was charged December 22 with grand theft and grand theft of a firearm.

So, again, I ask what is it with Port St. Lucie?  Is it really a haven for stupid criminals?  Or, is it simply the unlucky victim of the press that seems to be able to highlight the inane acts of its citizens and passers-through?  Whatever the situation, I daresay that the city’s Convention and Visitors’ Bureau will probably have an uphill climb if things don’t change.

Bank robber uses pay stub as hold-up note

I’m not sure if it’s more a sign of the bad economic times or just another example of how stupid people can be.  Last Friday a Fifth Third Bank in Chicago was held-up and the robber escaped with only $400.  The note used simply stated, “Be Quick Be Quit [sic].  Give your cash or I’ll shoot.”  Okay, maybe he was nervous and didn’t notice the spelling error…. but that’s not the dumbest part of this story.

The accused robber, who was arrested in his Cary, Ill., home was easily tracked.  How?  Well, he use his October pay stub to write the note.  Half of it was left with the teller; the other half was found outside the bank’s front doors.  And, as with most pay stubs, it had his name and address clearly listed.

Money and the desire for more will make people do stupid things.  However, I’m not quite convinced that the stupidity shown in this instance could be solely blamed on it.  And I certainly wouldn’t consider this even remotely close to being the “heist of the century.”  Remember….proper planning prevents poor performance!

Ron Jeremy and pepper spray? TMZ got the story wrong, he says.

This past week, gossip site TMZ reported that porn granddaddy Ron Jeremy casually ate his dinner at Mel’s Diner on the Sunset Strip after a paparazzo attempted to snap pictures and then pepper sprayed a companion of Ron’s who objected to the photos.

In TMZ’s report, photographer Nasim Saleh began taking the pictures when a friend stood up to stop him and the spraying ensued.  Saleh stated he was only acting in self-defense and was arrested for criminal use of tear gas.  TMZ further reported that Saleh had told authorities that he was a photographer for TMZ, which they denied.

However, Jeremy has stated that TMZ got the facts of the story wrong.  He states that he and Dennis Hof, owner of the Moonlight Bunny Ranch, were inside eating and didn’t even know what was happening outside.  Jeremy said in an interview with Adult Video News:

“[Saleh] sent someone into the diner to ask if we’d do interviews and we said, ‘No problem!  We’d be glad to when we get out.  So someone was rude to the guy and said, ‘Get lost, they don’t want to bother with you.’  We never said that.  Someone just thought that we didn’t want to get bothered.  This is not Lindsey Lohan or Britney Spears.  We like attention.”

Jeremy also stated that Saleh may have been acting in self-defense as witnesses claim that someone attempting to shoo him from the premises did so while threatening him with a knife.

The biggest laughs, however, came from Jeremy when he read the “punchline” of TMZ’s story, “….we’re told during the incident, Ron Jeremy just kept eating.”

Jeremy, however, gloated over the gaff and even found it humorous that Hof didn’t even rate a mention in the article:

“Six seasons of HBO’s ‘Cathouse’ and they didn’t even put Dennis Hof’s name in there — he didn’t even exist.  It was Ron Jeremy and a pastrami sandwich, not Dennis and his bowl of soup.  So I want to rub that in his face every chance I get.  It bothered him; he didn’t act like it did, but it did.”

Don’t worry Hof….the world knows now….

Adolf Hitler has birthday cake issues

Maybe you’ve heard this story already, but it does lead to a controversial argument.  In Pennsylvania, 3-year-old Aldof Hitler Campbell was refused a personalized birthday cake by a grocery store because of his name.

Adolf’s father, Heath Campbell, said:

I think people need to take their heads out of the cloud they’ve been in and start focusing on the future and not on the past.  There’s a new president and he says it’s time for a change; well, then it’s time for a change.  They need to accept a name.  A name’s a name.  The kid isn’t going to grow up and do what (Hitler) did.

A very admirable statement.  And, with any hope, he won’t.

On the other side of the coin, there’s the statement from the store:

We reserve the right not to print anything on the cake that we deem to be inappropriate.  We considered this inappropriate.

Karen Meleta, the spokeswoman for the Greenwich, PA,  ShopRite, continued to defend the supermarket as she said the Campbells had similar requests denied at the same store the last two years and added that Campbell previously had asked for a swastika to be included in the decoration.

The cake requested was finally created at a Wal-Mart in Pennsylvania.  Wal-Mart has stated they plan to review their policies regarding cake decorations and other requests in light of the publicity of the decoration.

The family, who lives in Hunterdon County, NJ, held the birthday party and reported that 12 others including children of mixed races were invited and attended.

The Campbells’ other children have unique names as well:  JoyceLynn Aryan Nation Campbell, 1, and Honszlynn Hinler Jeannie Campbell, who will be 1 in April.

Campbell states that he chose the name for his son because it was unique and most other children wouldn’t have it.  He also states that he was not raised to avoid persons of other races but to not mix with them socially or romantically and plans to raise his son differently.

He made the statement while showing off the boots he states were worn by a German soldier in WWII and touted his German ancestry.

So is it an innocent child who is being discriminated against because his parents foolishly didn’t consider what problems his name would cause?  Or is this a case of white supremacists trying to live vicariously through the publicity they believe their childrens’ names will bring them to further their “cause” for separation?

I have friends who participate in WWII re-enacting.  Some do German, and even though they occasionally have parties they would never consider requesting a cake with a swastika on it, even if it were for an “official” event.  Why?  Because they’re not Nazis and don’t believe in the policies and politics of that era, even though they re-enact history either for fun or to “honor veterans” as some put it.

So why would parents want a cake with a swastika on it?  If it were actually being used as the Hindu, Buddhist, or Jainism symbols, I could see that.  Even German-Jewish WWI aviator Fritz Beckhardt wore one as a good luck charm.  It wasn’t until the Nazi Party used it to denote their Aryan supremacy that it became a reviled symbol.

And even if this cake wasn’t to have a swastika on it, is the store right in it’s decision to deny Adolf a cake with his name on it?  Just because someone has an unpopular name, does that mean corporations have the right to discriminate?  If the Campbells arrived and asked for just “Happy Birthday Adolf,” would they have been denied?

This is an argument that will go on for quite some time in chat rooms and blogs.  I don’t have an answer for it.  It is an argument between freedom to name your child as you wish to corporate policy protecting customers from offensive material.  Who makes the decision, though?  Where is the line drawn?

Know where the key is when handcuffing your partner!

The Detroit Free Press reported that Thursday a Dearborn, Michigan man called the police to his house to borrow a key.  Apparently, he had misplaced his and was unable to free his wife who had been handcuffed to the bed.

Fortunately, the universal key carried by police officers did the trick.  The police say that it was a consensual and intimate relationship, not an imprisonment, so no charges should be filed.  Besides, I figure the publicity will either help him remember to keep it close by or cause his wife to never want to do that again.

Proper planning prevents poor performance — so keep your keys within reach!

Sneezing linked to sex?

Friday, the Journal of the Royal Society of Medicine published a paper by Mahmood Bhutta and Harold Maxwell citing the case of a man who suffered sneezing fits whenever he thought about sex.  Seeing this as an interesting phenomenon, the researchers entered anonymous Internet chat rooms and were told by 17 people, of both sexes, that they either sneezed when thinking about sex or after achieving orgasm.

Bhutta is an ear-nose-throat specialist and said that this could be an inherited trait and can be more widespread than others first thought.  I want to see the genetic study that shows which gene is responsible for sex sneezes!

When discussing his findings, Bhutta said:

It certainly seems odd, but I think this reflex demonstrates evolutionary relics in the wiring of a part of the nervous system called the autonomic nervous system….  This is the part beyond our control, and which controls things like our heart rate and the amount of light let in by our pupils.  Sometimes the signals in this system get crossed, and I think this may be why some people sneeze when they think about sex.

Reportedly, there are only two other references to sneezing and sex in medical journals.  Bhutta believes that embarrassment could be the reason this phenomenon isn’t being researched further.

If you suffer from this, don’t be afraid to say something!  It’s more common than you think and might provide invaluable insight into how sex and other bodily functions relate.  I can’t wait to read more!

Second sandwich assault in Florida

Once again, Port St. Lucie, Fla., becomes headline news as a second man is charged with assualt after attacking a woman with a sandwich.

In this incident, the 20-year-old suspect threw a sandwich at his girlfriend’s face while they argued about automobile insurance.  He then reportedly hit her in the head with his fist.  The man has admitted to tossing the food product but denies actual physical contact with the woman.  He was arrested last Friday.

No reports on the type of sandwich have been made available by authorities.

Captain Jack Sparrow in brig over flashing women?

So much for Disneyland being the “Happiest place on earth” — especially for four actors fired in a scandal over women flashing their breasts.

Disneyland officials state that the firings were due to a drop in popularity of the character and not the reported throngs of women flashing their breasts at the actors.  Captain Jack Sparrow was often found posing for pictures on “Tom Sawyer Island” but more likely could be located in the “New Orleans Square” near the “Pirates of the Caribbean” ride.  Some seemed to believe that women would just naturally flash themselves at the character made popular by Johnny Depp since they were on “Bourbon Street.”  The move from “New Orleans” to “Tom Sawyer Island” was made in response to the rumors and officials state that since visitors could not find the character, that wa the reason for the drop in popularity.

However, even the fired actors state that no such things happened or were what led to the firings.  It is questionable to remove one of the largest and most popular characters in favor of adding new fairy actresses to promote Disney’s latest movie, “Tinkerbell.”

Many male friends state that when they have dressed in the Jack Sparrow costumes they have most often been the center of attention from women at the gatherings — some inebriated and some not.  Perhaps the thought of being with the bad-boy of the seas is thrilling enough for them to forego modesty in a children-targeted amusement park.  However, I’m pretty sure Disney will soon return Captain Jack to the line-up as the returns from “Tinkerbell” wane.